The View From Down Here: Torture

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Ziggy Pelham

Gretchen Pelham photoI seriously don’t know WHAT I have done to deserve this woman.  I mean, come on!  She dresses me up like I’m a blasted My Little Princess Pony with no regards to what I want or like.  She insists on riding me with her ever-expanding, vast backside when she knows her that her lard butt is too heavy for my delicate bone structure.  She embarrasses me in front of other foxhunters when she can’t figure out how to keep her inept self in my saddle or how to keep her trap shut.  And now she is encouraging my peeps, my girls who I take great pride in teaching, how to treat me like a toy.  A little girlie-girl’s toy.  With rainbow hair and sprinkle farts.  Sigh.  I really need to figure out how to ditch this Wench.

The View From Down Here: In the Georgia Pines

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Ziggy Pelham

Grosvenor Merle-Smith photoThis past January my Tennessee Valley Hunt had a joint meet with the Belle Meade Hunt down in Georgia. We hunted for two days down in the pine scrub. Gretchen had been down to Belle Meade four years before, but back then she took that horribly uppity and large pony with her instead of me. Humph. I must admit that when she lead me out of the field to load up I stuck my tongue out at him.

We were traveling with the same other TVH ladies that we went with to Long Run in Kentucky. I was to be the third horse in a two horse slant load. Again!! This is mortifying. I DO NOT FIT in the corner where the saddle rack usually goes.  [Gretchen’s Note: I’m sorry to contradict, but yes you do fit! Quite well, actually.   You’re like one of those pocket puppies who can fit in a purse. The only trouble was closing the door on your overstuffed hindquarters. The fat rolls got stuck in the doors.]

The View From Down Here: Two Blessings in Two States

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Ziggy Pelham

This month of October I went to my Tennessee Valley Hunt’s 25th Anniversary Opening Meet and Blessing of the Hounds. The next week the Scarlet Wench, aka Gretchen, took me to Long Run Hounds’ Opening Meet and Blessing of the Hounds in Louisville, KY. I had to dodge the elephant warmbloods who were jealous of my talent, and show a whole new hunt how a 12.1 hand POA can be a great hunt horse!

What a great time! Here are some awesome moments with these two Opening Meets:

The View From Down Here: The Cubbing Coyote

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Ziggy Pelham

Gretchen Pelham photoThis past weekend I went cubbing with my hunt, the Tennessee Valley Hunt. We went to what is fast becoming our “Hit and Run” fixture, Big Valley. We started off in the corn at the bottom of Big Valley’s hills, and we were off!
I had a junior member in my saddle this day, and let me tell you I was happy it wasn’t the Scarlet Wench. Her ever-expanding derriere has been in my saddle far too much this season already. I was happy for the weight relief! [Gretchen’s Note: Your weight tape says you top 600 pounds, My Little Hippo. I’d keep the fat jokes to yourself, or I’ll put you back in the grazing muzzle again just for spite!]

The View From Down Here - Carrying the TVH Huntsman

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Ziggy Pelham

This past Saturday our Tennessee Valley Hunt hit another mile stone. I was out hunting. And you know, anytime I go hunting something amazing happens. I’m just that good. [Gretchen’s Note: Yes, I knew that the day was going to be spectacular when I was giving you a bath in the pre-dawn hours before the hunt. You were screeching about the carnivorous water snake that was going to gnaw your feet off. It was the hose, of course, but you would not listen. Yes, Ziggy-Zig, you were magnificent that morning.]

Give me a break; a bath at 4 o’clock in the morning?! The Wench was off her rocker.

I must admit that I didn’t enjoy the extreme early morning timing, but I didn’t whine like Gretchen did about it. The early mornings help our puppies get exposed to the best possible scenting conditions. But still, a handsome dude like me needs SOME beauty sleep to maintain such a striking figure. [Gretchen’s Note: Oh please. A striking figure such as you couldn’t get through the barn doors without a come-along and some grease!]

Please ignore the blabbering Wench. Lord knows I do.